The above question was one of the search terms used that led to my blog. I laughed. Aloud. For a minute or two. It is a question that could have very well been written by one of my friends. Therefore, I have to answer.
Answer:
So what? Do you want to date your friend Tamara? Otherwise, it shouldn't matter. I am sure the Tamara you know won't suddenly change into a hypersexual crazed lesbian. And if she does...why does it matter? There are hypersexual crazed heterosexual people everywhere. (I'm just saying!)
Before you proceed, you will need to ask yourself a few questions: What is the nature of your relationship? Is this your shopping buddy? A really close friend? Co-worker? Has your relationship entered into a space that allows you to talk about such an intimate issue?
For instance, some of my friends have made it clear on several occassions that they do not want to talk about their sex life, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, etc-- and I respect that. With these people, I know it doesn't matter and I am content with just being the best friend I can be. We value the same things and offer support where needed.
So I say to you-- consider Tamara in this equation. She is not just gay. She is a human being with interests, hobbies, likes, and dislikes. What will knowing this minute detail do for your relationship? Will it enhance it? You know, you don't have to be sure she is gay to be a support system. Another simple way to handle this is to just ask her and be ready for an honest answer. And remember, this has nothing to do with you. Not everyone is ready or willing to be open about their sexuality. It's best to let her tell you if and when she wants to.
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