First, we went to the movies. We saw Valentine's Day. We really enjoyed it! I mean really. I liked that the story line had twists and turns that I couldn't figure out. Some were a little predictable-- like the cheating bastard--but there's always one. It's also a gay friendly movie, so I encourage everyone to go see it. Then, we went out to eat.
Where: Emerywood Cafe
What we ate!
Appetizers
Duck Confit Spring Rolls; Served with a duck sweet and sour sauce.
Entrees
Bacon-Wrapped Scallops served over goat cheese and sun-dried tomato risotto, spaghetti zucchini and squash, with Béarnaise sauce.
Crab and Tarragon-Stuffed Red Snapper, served with roasted Yukon potatoes, sauteed tri-color carrots and Hollandaise sauce.
Dessert
Chocolate Mousse with whipped cream and slivered almonds
Chocolate bread pudding
After dinner, we went to Barnes & Noble. It's one of our favorite hangout spots. I had such a great time that I went to sleep around midnight. That's early for me. I hope you had a wonderful day as well. ~Ciao!
Showing posts with label lesbian relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lesbian relationships. Show all posts
Monday, February 15, 2010
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Home Alone
My girlfriend and I don't spend that much time apart. I mean occassionally we'll be apart...but it is very rare. She's at her mom's house. I'm guessing she'll come home tomorrow, but I'm not really sure. Her little sister is graduating from middle school. Isn't that sweet? I don't know if I have ever stayed the night here by myself. Hmmm... I can't think of any time where I would have.
So on my agenda: finish up pr by tam newsletter template, laundry, dishes, cook dinner- (egg salad sandwiches! yummy), wash my hair-- so not in the mood but I have to cuz it's itching, sew some purses for charity sale, and I will probably do a little bit of overtime on the day job.
I also have to clean the kitchen floor. Does anyone have a good floor cleaner? I declare mops (w/pine sol or bleach type cleaner) and swiffer wet jet just push the dirt around. It urks me to no end. It seems like it is dirty as soon as it is clean. All remedies appreciated.
I will probably read a book too. I've read all of the ones I checked out from the library. Well except one by Rochelle Alers, she's one of my fave authors but I couldn't get into this one so I already checked it back in! Well I do have plenty to get accomplished! So I will write again later on.... TTFN.
So on my agenda: finish up pr by tam newsletter template, laundry, dishes, cook dinner- (egg salad sandwiches! yummy), wash my hair-- so not in the mood but I have to cuz it's itching, sew some purses for charity sale, and I will probably do a little bit of overtime on the day job.
I also have to clean the kitchen floor. Does anyone have a good floor cleaner? I declare mops (w/pine sol or bleach type cleaner) and swiffer wet jet just push the dirt around. It urks me to no end. It seems like it is dirty as soon as it is clean. All remedies appreciated.
I will probably read a book too. I've read all of the ones I checked out from the library. Well except one by Rochelle Alers, she's one of my fave authors but I couldn't get into this one so I already checked it back in! Well I do have plenty to get accomplished! So I will write again later on.... TTFN.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
There's (Always) A Meeting in my Bedroom
So I settled on Silk. Although the post title was in the 200's, Freak Me Baby set it off. I was actually in 8th grade singing this song. So sad--my momma used to pop me in the mouth. LOL.
After I wrote the other post about LBD, I began to wonder what do you need in order to make a relationship really work? I by no means am an expert on relationships. Yes I've been in this thang for a long time, but for a few years it was shear will. We were together because we wanted to be together-not because everything was great. We were distant-not communicating as we normally did - we almost broke up. ALMOST. I mean I didn't think a relationship could withstand such turmoil. But then we had to think about it. Could we live without one another? I will admit, the betrayed Taurus in me thought to myself--yes. But after careful consideration, the answer was undoubtedly a, "Hell No!"
I remember being in arguments and having good make-up sex...but was the problem really fixed? Some say, sex can only fix some of the stuff - the emotions that make us "feel good". It kicks off those neurons and endorphins and we are "happy" once again. So is the problem still there? Can sex keep a relationship together if you have it often enough? Should we be having more meetings in the bedroom and less in the boardroom?
If the sex is missing, does it mean that something else is missing? And if something is missing -- what the hell is it? I mean we probably have heard the same answers over and over again: communication, love, self esteem, support, etc. etc. But are those just exscuses? There is a saying that goes: When a relationship is good sex is only 10% of the equation. When the relationship is bad, sex is 90% of the equation.
Do we(lesbians) use sex as a form of communication? If so, what are we saying?
After I wrote the other post about LBD, I began to wonder what do you need in order to make a relationship really work? I by no means am an expert on relationships. Yes I've been in this thang for a long time, but for a few years it was shear will. We were together because we wanted to be together-not because everything was great. We were distant-not communicating as we normally did - we almost broke up. ALMOST. I mean I didn't think a relationship could withstand such turmoil. But then we had to think about it. Could we live without one another? I will admit, the betrayed Taurus in me thought to myself--yes. But after careful consideration, the answer was undoubtedly a, "Hell No!"
I remember being in arguments and having good make-up sex...but was the problem really fixed? Some say, sex can only fix some of the stuff - the emotions that make us "feel good". It kicks off those neurons and endorphins and we are "happy" once again. So is the problem still there? Can sex keep a relationship together if you have it often enough? Should we be having more meetings in the bedroom and less in the boardroom?
If the sex is missing, does it mean that something else is missing? And if something is missing -- what the hell is it? I mean we probably have heard the same answers over and over again: communication, love, self esteem, support, etc. etc. But are those just exscuses? There is a saying that goes: When a relationship is good sex is only 10% of the equation. When the relationship is bad, sex is 90% of the equation.
Do we(lesbians) use sex as a form of communication? If so, what are we saying?
Monday, April 20, 2009
When We Make Love
"One other requirement is that she must want to do "it" to 90's r&b. If Ginuwine's "So Anxious" doesn't get your panties wet, I don't know what's wrong with you." Raych
Was feeling Raych on this post and especially on her statement above. Perfect timing too as posts this week are inspired by 90's R&B Chart toppers.
I saw Ginuwine in concert in college. I wasn't head over heels screaming like the other girls. One of the clues that I wasn't straight--but his music--in the right moment... as Raych suggested should arouse you right?
In my mind it's 1/4 physical, 1/4 mental, 1/4 mood, and 1/4 opportunity--Ginuwine's "So Anxious" (and many more songs), bring the mental and mood into cooperation.
That got me to thinking about Lesbian Bed Death.
It is alleged that when lesbians get into relationships that their sex drive decreases. I can't imagine the desire for sex leaving me. There were times when I was too tired...too stressed...too anything, but the desire was still there...
Does this phenomenon really exist? Are their times when you are in a relationship when sex is not a priority? Do you ever feel like sex is a chore? It is times like these when I am made to feel like a horny toad...
Was feeling Raych on this post and especially on her statement above. Perfect timing too as posts this week are inspired by 90's R&B Chart toppers.
I saw Ginuwine in concert in college. I wasn't head over heels screaming like the other girls. One of the clues that I wasn't straight--but his music--in the right moment... as Raych suggested should arouse you right?
In my mind it's 1/4 physical, 1/4 mental, 1/4 mood, and 1/4 opportunity--Ginuwine's "So Anxious" (and many more songs), bring the mental and mood into cooperation.
That got me to thinking about Lesbian Bed Death.
It is alleged that when lesbians get into relationships that their sex drive decreases. I can't imagine the desire for sex leaving me. There were times when I was too tired...too stressed...too anything, but the desire was still there...
Does this phenomenon really exist? Are their times when you are in a relationship when sex is not a priority? Do you ever feel like sex is a chore? It is times like these when I am made to feel like a horny toad...
Sunday, March 8, 2009
I want what you have...
I've heard that statement to many times. And it is always in reference to a relationship. Yes, my relationship with my girlfriend is wonderful. Yes we will have a lot of years under our belt this year.
We've had some really fun and marvelous times...
...BUT...
...not without the work. It has not been a walk in the park. We worked our tails off to get to this point. Let's talk about us being friends for 2 years before we even got into a relationship. I don't talk about how our other friendships were tested as we tried to keep it in the closet. I don't talk about the crying, the pain, or the shame we experienced in the beginning. And I don't talk about the all-girls school heteronormative black experience.
It was a painful journey, but our love for each other buffered it along the way. We had to work on communication, getting used to each others habits, the normal likes and dislikes coupled with all the stuff lesbians have to deal with. So please, don't look at other people's relationships and say, "I want what you all have."
You only see what's on the surface.
We've had some really fun and marvelous times...
...BUT...
...not without the work. It has not been a walk in the park. We worked our tails off to get to this point. Let's talk about us being friends for 2 years before we even got into a relationship. I don't talk about how our other friendships were tested as we tried to keep it in the closet. I don't talk about the crying, the pain, or the shame we experienced in the beginning. And I don't talk about the all-girls school heteronormative black experience.
It was a painful journey, but our love for each other buffered it along the way. We had to work on communication, getting used to each others habits, the normal likes and dislikes coupled with all the stuff lesbians have to deal with. So please, don't look at other people's relationships and say, "I want what you all have."
You only see what's on the surface.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
my girlfriend is gay
I didn't know it right away. We'd always been close. One day, she gave me this look. That's all it took. Then I considered myself a lesbian; others said I was bisexual. I remember that one night... I'm not supposed to share personal stuff about her on here, because who knows who reads this thing. I am allowed to say, "I love her so much!" LOL. Oh well, just know it involved me...trying to be coy. LOL. Just reminiscing.
Monday, February 16, 2009
I'm a Valentine's Whore
I mean it is literally, one of my top 4 favorite holidays. Most people would say its because I am in a relationship. That's not necessarily true; our worst argument was on a Valentine's Day! That memory lingers.
But I love it because it represents one of the most precious emotions-love. You don't have to be romantically involved with someone to have a good valentines. My momma would send me a valentine box every year. It would have little knick knacks....cups, candy, bubble bath, stuffed animals, and usually a card.
As my girlfriend and I were reminiscing, we realized, we couldn't remember most of the evenings we celebrated. Usually we would just order in or my cousin would cook for us. We had actually gone out for v-day only 1 other time. We had a great time. Totally spontaneous.
We hung out with her mom for a couple of hours then we gathered our treats (wine and chocolate), looked for something to do, decided on a dinner destination and savored the ambiance. I really can rate this V-day as #1.
We asked a couple of friends to come with us, but they decided to do nothing. It always kills me how people complain about not getting invited anywhere, but when you invite them, they say no. Just doesn't make any sense to me. Valentine's Day is what you make it, PEOPLE! Seriously.
Anywho...I feel so blessed, because we had a car all weekend. Sometimes, I felt we were just riding around for the heck of it. Sure is nice to be grateful for the little things. LOL. Well I hope you had a wonderful weekend, a beautiful day, and showed your gratitude whenever possible!
Love ya!
Tamara
But I love it because it represents one of the most precious emotions-love. You don't have to be romantically involved with someone to have a good valentines. My momma would send me a valentine box every year. It would have little knick knacks....cups, candy, bubble bath, stuffed animals, and usually a card.
As my girlfriend and I were reminiscing, we realized, we couldn't remember most of the evenings we celebrated. Usually we would just order in or my cousin would cook for us. We had actually gone out for v-day only 1 other time. We had a great time. Totally spontaneous.
We hung out with her mom for a couple of hours then we gathered our treats (wine and chocolate), looked for something to do, decided on a dinner destination and savored the ambiance. I really can rate this V-day as #1.
We asked a couple of friends to come with us, but they decided to do nothing. It always kills me how people complain about not getting invited anywhere, but when you invite them, they say no. Just doesn't make any sense to me. Valentine's Day is what you make it, PEOPLE! Seriously.
Anywho...I feel so blessed, because we had a car all weekend. Sometimes, I felt we were just riding around for the heck of it. Sure is nice to be grateful for the little things. LOL. Well I hope you had a wonderful weekend, a beautiful day, and showed your gratitude whenever possible!
Love ya!
Tamara
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Dating on a Budget Series
Valentine's Day is coming up really soon. I've been writing a dating on a budget series over at queercents. It runs every Monday afternoon. If you've missed the goods so far, be sure to catch up:
Dating on a Budget: The Rules
Dating on a Budget: Simple First Dates
Dating on a Budget: Hmm Hmm Good!
Dating on a Budget: The Rules
Dating on a Budget: Simple First Dates
Dating on a Budget: Hmm Hmm Good!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Holidays
This time I am not complaining about not spending Christmas with my love. She will be here and I will be in Florida with my immediate family. I haven't seen my family in over a year, so it is high time I get my arse home. I spoke with my granny the other day and told her I was coming, she was soooo thrilled. I then realized my momma hadn't told anyone so it might be a surprise. I swore granny to secrecy and didn't mention it to anyone else. The only problem is, I don't know how I am getting from the airport. LOL. I am sure we will have that figured out by then.
The only reason I am not as sad is we will spend Christmas Eve together (I will only be gone from then until Monday), plus we realized we aren't the only ones trying to make the decision of with whose family to spend the holidays. It's a classic issue for all couples, that I have seen played out many ways.
We are thinking of just going on vacation from now on. I like the idea of spending the holidays somewhere new, fun, and with little to no stress. For New Years Eve, we have sort of a tradition, we either go to Night Watch services or we watch movies and order pizza. Either way we have a good time. One year we went to New York City and attended a show at Lipz. It was great cabaret performances from all and a drink made by Frankie that sat me on my a**. That was my first trip to the city and I can't wait to get back. We haven't even decided about New Years yet.
The only reason I am not as sad is we will spend Christmas Eve together (I will only be gone from then until Monday), plus we realized we aren't the only ones trying to make the decision of with whose family to spend the holidays. It's a classic issue for all couples, that I have seen played out many ways.
We are thinking of just going on vacation from now on. I like the idea of spending the holidays somewhere new, fun, and with little to no stress. For New Years Eve, we have sort of a tradition, we either go to Night Watch services or we watch movies and order pizza. Either way we have a good time. One year we went to New York City and attended a show at Lipz. It was great cabaret performances from all and a drink made by Frankie that sat me on my a**. That was my first trip to the city and I can't wait to get back. We haven't even decided about New Years yet.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Gratefulness is flowing from my heart...
There are times in life when you look around and no one is there. When you think that it couldn't possibly get any worse than this. I've been to that time and each day got worse than the last. I didn't know why, what, or how my life could have been turned so upside down in such a short period of time.
I began to seriously pray. I mean praying without ceasing. It didn't get any better. I was really surprised too. I thought prayer changes things. But prayer without faith is in vain. It didn't matter how hard I was praying if I didn't believe that my dreams would be fulfilled. Staying in the closet showed how little faith I actually had in God. I didn't believe that it was really okay to be gay and christian. For so many years, I refused to go to church. I mean really was like what the f* ever.
I was not fully embracing my whole self. I didn't know how to be okay with my love for my girlfriend and okay with my love for God. But now I know, it really isn't that hard. I go through my days thanking God for the opportunity to know genuine love for another human being. I look at her -- stare at her really-- and know that each good day wipes out 10 bad days.
Each time a parent decides to ask one of us to get married to a man makes me appreciate her love that much more. Because let's be real here...parents can be very influential and no one really wants to know life without a loved one. But her love for me and my love for her is so intense, that we are willing to deal with the drama that parents bring. Knowing that we have a greater parent that continues to bless us each and every second of the day makes it that much easier.
I began to seriously pray. I mean praying without ceasing. It didn't get any better. I was really surprised too. I thought prayer changes things. But prayer without faith is in vain. It didn't matter how hard I was praying if I didn't believe that my dreams would be fulfilled. Staying in the closet showed how little faith I actually had in God. I didn't believe that it was really okay to be gay and christian. For so many years, I refused to go to church. I mean really was like what the f* ever.
I was not fully embracing my whole self. I didn't know how to be okay with my love for my girlfriend and okay with my love for God. But now I know, it really isn't that hard. I go through my days thanking God for the opportunity to know genuine love for another human being. I look at her -- stare at her really-- and know that each good day wipes out 10 bad days.
Each time a parent decides to ask one of us to get married to a man makes me appreciate her love that much more. Because let's be real here...parents can be very influential and no one really wants to know life without a loved one. But her love for me and my love for her is so intense, that we are willing to deal with the drama that parents bring. Knowing that we have a greater parent that continues to bless us each and every second of the day makes it that much easier.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Christmas Gifts
I know my girlfriend reads this blog, but hey, I surprise her all the time right in her face LOL. So what I am looking for are free Christmas Gift suggestions. I usually do something real elaborate for the holidays, but not this year. So do any of you have any suggestions? I am not really looking for an item, but I am looking at doing something.
An attack on love...
Some people find it hard to believe that I am and have no problem with religion/sexuality and that I actually call myself a christian.
Here's the thing: If I believe that 1. I am a child of God, 2. He knew me before I knew myself, and 3. That God created me in his image then I must believe that 1. I am loved, 2. This is no surprise to him, and 3. I am not the abomination that others try to make me out to be.
I believe that it is our responsibility to practice loving. God loved us so much that he gave his son's life for us. (This is what I believe, whatever your religion I am sure there is a similar ideology). In return, we should continue to pay that love forward. Love.
An attack on gay marriage is an attack on love. Shouldn't we want love in our society? Wouldn't love make our society better? Relationships stronger? Whether it is big love or small love, shouldn't we be encouraging healthy loving relationships in all of its forms--especially between consenting adults?
Wouldn't that make for a stronger America?
Maybe we should eliminate marriages all together. It isn't creating the desired results. It doesn't keep a relationship or family unit together. What it does is give people who get married, special rights (tax breaks, visitation rights, etc). Marriage doesn't create a family....it manages families.
As a matter of fact, marriage is not even talked about in the bible as a necessity. Let me hush, I do not think you all are ready for that conversation yet.
New campaign: No on Marriage, Yes on Love?
Yeah, I said it, now what?
Here's the thing: If I believe that 1. I am a child of God, 2. He knew me before I knew myself, and 3. That God created me in his image then I must believe that 1. I am loved, 2. This is no surprise to him, and 3. I am not the abomination that others try to make me out to be.
I believe that it is our responsibility to practice loving. God loved us so much that he gave his son's life for us. (This is what I believe, whatever your religion I am sure there is a similar ideology). In return, we should continue to pay that love forward. Love.
An attack on gay marriage is an attack on love. Shouldn't we want love in our society? Wouldn't love make our society better? Relationships stronger? Whether it is big love or small love, shouldn't we be encouraging healthy loving relationships in all of its forms--especially between consenting adults?
Wouldn't that make for a stronger America?
Maybe we should eliminate marriages all together. It isn't creating the desired results. It doesn't keep a relationship or family unit together. What it does is give people who get married, special rights (tax breaks, visitation rights, etc). Marriage doesn't create a family....it manages families.
As a matter of fact, marriage is not even talked about in the bible as a necessity. Let me hush, I do not think you all are ready for that conversation yet.
New campaign: No on Marriage, Yes on Love?
Yeah, I said it, now what?
Monday, December 8, 2008
Straight and Narrow
I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired. It's like parents get together and have a secret meeting when they suspect their child of being gay. They have a script:
"I want grandchildren." (That's nice.)
"You've changed. You're just so different." (I have changed. I grew the hell up.) *LOL
"When are you going to give me some grandchildren?" (When are you going to give me $1 million?)
"You should get married." (You should have voted no on Prop 8 and maybe that would have occurred.)
"I want you to be happy. You don't seem happy." (I'm not because you are bugging the hell out of me.)
"You need a man." ( You need a man, so you can stay the hell out of my bedroom.)
"I just want what's best for you." ( I just want you to know that you don't get to decide what's best for me.)
I mean I just don't get it anymore. I am (and many of you are to) too old for this line of questioning. Alot of you are over the age of 18 and well on your own or making moves to get there, right? What happened to, "When you get out of my house, you can do anything you want to do with your life." When did parents decide that they wanted to continue to control their kids lives post high school and college? In the words of Major Payne, "Pop your ti-ttie out his mouth" and let people do them.
Growing up, we did not question our parents actions. No, we let them make decision upon decision without questioning them. Plus if we had, we might have gotten slapped. Now I know we can't slap our parents...well we could, but I wouldn't advise it, but there has to be a level of respect on both sides so that we can live our life the way we want to live it. Acceptance is one thing. Disrespect is another. How would you handle your parents constantly nagging you about these issues, when you have made it clear that it is 1) none of their damn business and 2) it ain't happening.
"I want grandchildren." (That's nice.)
"You've changed. You're just so different." (I have changed. I grew the hell up.) *LOL
"When are you going to give me some grandchildren?" (When are you going to give me $1 million?)
"You should get married." (You should have voted no on Prop 8 and maybe that would have occurred.)
"I want you to be happy. You don't seem happy." (I'm not because you are bugging the hell out of me.)
"You need a man." ( You need a man, so you can stay the hell out of my bedroom.)
"I just want what's best for you." ( I just want you to know that you don't get to decide what's best for me.)
I mean I just don't get it anymore. I am (and many of you are to) too old for this line of questioning. Alot of you are over the age of 18 and well on your own or making moves to get there, right? What happened to, "When you get out of my house, you can do anything you want to do with your life." When did parents decide that they wanted to continue to control their kids lives post high school and college? In the words of Major Payne, "Pop your ti-ttie out his mouth" and let people do them.
Growing up, we did not question our parents actions. No, we let them make decision upon decision without questioning them. Plus if we had, we might have gotten slapped. Now I know we can't slap our parents...well we could, but I wouldn't advise it, but there has to be a level of respect on both sides so that we can live our life the way we want to live it. Acceptance is one thing. Disrespect is another. How would you handle your parents constantly nagging you about these issues, when you have made it clear that it is 1) none of their damn business and 2) it ain't happening.
The Gay Marriage Thing Part II
Marriage, Prop 8, Gay Marriage. Even though I am writing about it, and it is one topic that is seriously overdone, it didn't keep me from looking at the movie of the same title. It took me awhile to get the funds together (yes, $2 was that hard for me to come by) but it was well worth it!
"THE GAY MARRIAGE THING tells the stories behind the signs. Stories lived by people on both sides of the marriage debate. I chose quite deliberately to speak with people who did not agree with my life, let alone my opinion. People ask me if this was difficult. My answer is always a resounding yes. But that’s the point. True discussion and communication is often difficult. It is easy to ignore your opposer’s humanity while they ignore yours. It is less work to scream and shout than to take the time to find the right words to speak in a civil manner. It is less frightening to cover your ears and avoid hearing another’s story." (source: Stephanie Higgins)
That statement literally sent chills up and down my arms. This truth is so profound and and a foundation for engaging one another in true communication.
Check out the trailer:
That statement literally sent chills up and down my arms. This truth is so profound and and a foundation for engaging one another in true communication.
Check out the trailer:
I think this is a good time to add, although my mom and I have very different views on my life, I still love her and she still loves me. I guess she just won't be helping me to pick out my wedding dress. Oh well....naw let me take that back. Everyone is a critic, so I am sure she will have something to say about that too.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Gratefulness Part II
I made my way through the airport and subway with ease.
My bags arrived right along with me.
I didn't cry....
I didn't, instead I smiled.
Thinking about "the kiss"
The one that said, " I know you are only going to be gone for a couple of days, but I will miss you and this is what you are coming home too."
I smiled.
The business center here at the hotel is the bomb. So I will be able to complete the work I need to get done this weekend...and best of all, blog in what free time I do have, which isn't much.
I am so freakin' grateful.
My bags arrived right along with me.
I didn't cry....
I didn't, instead I smiled.
Thinking about "the kiss"
The one that said, " I know you are only going to be gone for a couple of days, but I will miss you and this is what you are coming home too."
I smiled.
The business center here at the hotel is the bomb. So I will be able to complete the work I need to get done this weekend...and best of all, blog in what free time I do have, which isn't much.
I am so freakin' grateful.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Busy & Stressed
It has been a long time since I felt stressed about work. You know that stress when you have so much to do, deadlines to meet, and so little time to do it in. Today was the first time I had to deal with that type of stress in at least what 2 years...since that old job I told you all about. So to de-stress, I decided to not do anything today.
I took out my handy dandy calendar, made a priority list and straight relaxed. We watched a movie, played games on the computer, talked and spent time with each other. Because I won't be home this weekend, it is extremely important that we get that quality time in before I leave.
I had to remember that I can't be everything to everybody and I am not superwoman. I used to try to be...not anymore. I had to look realistically at my day and figure out what I could and am willing to accomplish. Spending time with the love of my life was one of them.
I took out my handy dandy calendar, made a priority list and straight relaxed. We watched a movie, played games on the computer, talked and spent time with each other. Because I won't be home this weekend, it is extremely important that we get that quality time in before I leave.
I had to remember that I can't be everything to everybody and I am not superwoman. I used to try to be...not anymore. I had to look realistically at my day and figure out what I could and am willing to accomplish. Spending time with the love of my life was one of them.
Cooking Adventures
Well we cooked dinner; fried fish and homemade onion rings. We've been cooking a lot lately. It was really good too, but let me tell you how it went down...
1st I was using beer batter without beer...instead I used old bay seasoning and water....it did the trick
We did the onion rings first, they turned out nice and crispy.
While she made the tartar sauce (which she added a dash of Worcester sauce to because we were running out of relish) I started cooking the fish.
Tell me why the fish sank right to the bottom of the pan and proceeded to stick. The first and last 2 pieces came out fine... The ones in the middle literally fell apart in the pan.
I couldn't do anything but laugh...and stare in disbelief. I have never seen fried fish fall apart in the pan. She said it was because the fish was too wet when I started cooking it....
Oh well, it was still good.
1st I was using beer batter without beer...instead I used old bay seasoning and water....it did the trick
We did the onion rings first, they turned out nice and crispy.
While she made the tartar sauce (which she added a dash of Worcester sauce to because we were running out of relish) I started cooking the fish.
Tell me why the fish sank right to the bottom of the pan and proceeded to stick. The first and last 2 pieces came out fine... The ones in the middle literally fell apart in the pan.
I couldn't do anything but laugh...and stare in disbelief. I have never seen fried fish fall apart in the pan. She said it was because the fish was too wet when I started cooking it....
Oh well, it was still good.
The Gay Marriage Thing, Part 1
On my way home the other night, I got to thinking about marriage again. I remember when I was younger, I didn't want to get married. I didn't see the benefit. My mother was not married to my father, I saw ok--but not great relationships...mostly arguing or the woman doing what the man told her to do. The feminist in me said, "what the F* ever". I vowed to not live my life looking or needing a man.
I was content in going to college to get a degree and create a career, not to find a husband like so many of my other counterparts.
I wanted to own 3 homes: one in Florida, one on an island (preferably Jamaica), and one in the mountains.
I imagined weekends with the girls; hanging out, clubbing, shopping or just relaxing around the house with a good book.
Never did getting married seem like a viable option for me...now shacking up, maybe, but it was against my religion. (LOL, how funny)
For me, married meant being tied to a man that I would come to resent, but stay married too so that I wouldn't go to hell. (cuz divorce is a sin)
I thought about all of this in that 20 minute ride and I wondered, is there something more than marriage? Is there a better word-- a stronger word -- one filled with pure joy, lust, love, romance, compromise? "Civil union" seems so generic and unloving. Domestic partnership, that's akin to roommates.
Our relationships are not generic or unloving, and we are definitely bedmates, not roommates. I've racked my head, and still can't come up with the right word...any ideas?
I was content in going to college to get a degree and create a career, not to find a husband like so many of my other counterparts.
I wanted to own 3 homes: one in Florida, one on an island (preferably Jamaica), and one in the mountains.
I imagined weekends with the girls; hanging out, clubbing, shopping or just relaxing around the house with a good book.
Never did getting married seem like a viable option for me...now shacking up, maybe, but it was against my religion. (LOL, how funny)
For me, married meant being tied to a man that I would come to resent, but stay married too so that I wouldn't go to hell. (cuz divorce is a sin)
I thought about all of this in that 20 minute ride and I wondered, is there something more than marriage? Is there a better word-- a stronger word -- one filled with pure joy, lust, love, romance, compromise? "Civil union" seems so generic and unloving. Domestic partnership, that's akin to roommates.
Our relationships are not generic or unloving, and we are definitely bedmates, not roommates. I've racked my head, and still can't come up with the right word...any ideas?
Saturday, November 22, 2008
I'm Chillaxin....
I'm so glad that:
Gas prices are down. I can put $10 in and it's more than a quarter of a tank.
I made some money this weekend.
I met some great people.
My mom and I are really getting along. I mean, even talking about politics has been a breeze...just not sexuality...I'll take my wins in small doses.
My wireless internet is working from home...and I am not sitting in Panera.
It snowed...it was only a little bit, but the dusting we got was so cute.
I am so glad that all of my dreams are coming true.
I even had a pizza last night...reminded me of college, $5 domino pizzas from the guy walking through the dorm...ahh memories. Plus it was delicious.
I have stumbled upon some great blogs...and ya'll keep me cracking up laughing.
My neighbor's baby is sooo cute. She was laughing for no damn reason. Adorable.
I sold the cutest purse this weekend....that really made me feel good.
I had a lot of insight about my neighbors...I didn't like them at first...but now...they are okay.
I have love, joy, prosperity, gratitude, and God. This is a great life!
Gas prices are down. I can put $10 in and it's more than a quarter of a tank.
I made some money this weekend.
I met some great people.
My mom and I are really getting along. I mean, even talking about politics has been a breeze...just not sexuality...I'll take my wins in small doses.
My wireless internet is working from home...and I am not sitting in Panera.
It snowed...it was only a little bit, but the dusting we got was so cute.
I am so glad that all of my dreams are coming true.
I even had a pizza last night...reminded me of college, $5 domino pizzas from the guy walking through the dorm...ahh memories. Plus it was delicious.
I have stumbled upon some great blogs...and ya'll keep me cracking up laughing.
My neighbor's baby is sooo cute. She was laughing for no damn reason. Adorable.
I sold the cutest purse this weekend....that really made me feel good.
I had a lot of insight about my neighbors...I didn't like them at first...but now...they are okay.
I have love, joy, prosperity, gratitude, and God. This is a great life!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
A dream deferred...
So, yesterday was our anniversary. I was so surprised that my girlfriend...made dinner. I know, it sounds like...what? Dinner, that's all? But here me out.
First of all, she wanted to go to culinary school. She actually got accepted and they played with her financial aid...$40. Yes, $40 was all they gave her. So she took a step back but in the process she stopped cooking all together. And she can throw down. Now she only cooks like on holidays and even that is a rarity considering we go to other people's houses or someone else cooks at our house. I know. Sad. You probably wonder how we eat, if neither one of us cook...by the grace of God. LOL.
But last night, my baby threw it down, in more ways than one. ;-) She made pork steak, collard greens, and potatoes with onions. It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo delicious. I made sure that I saved some, because I wanted that meal to last. Actually it was a lot of food for only the two of us. Then she surprised me with my favorite candy: butterfinger and reese's peanut butter cups. I enjoyed my evening. Then we cuddled. It was sweet.
First of all, she wanted to go to culinary school. She actually got accepted and they played with her financial aid...$40. Yes, $40 was all they gave her. So she took a step back but in the process she stopped cooking all together. And she can throw down. Now she only cooks like on holidays and even that is a rarity considering we go to other people's houses or someone else cooks at our house. I know. Sad. You probably wonder how we eat, if neither one of us cook...by the grace of God. LOL.
But last night, my baby threw it down, in more ways than one. ;-) She made pork steak, collard greens, and potatoes with onions. It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo delicious. I made sure that I saved some, because I wanted that meal to last. Actually it was a lot of food for only the two of us. Then she surprised me with my favorite candy: butterfinger and reese's peanut butter cups. I enjoyed my evening. Then we cuddled. It was sweet.
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